Sacred Ceremony in the Time of Covid

I am giving myself 10 minutes of processing and then nightly routine commences.

My husband and I held sacred ceremony this evening; for ourselves, for our family, for society and the collective, and for The Mother.

While my husband put little bubby to bed I cleansed the living room and other common areas of our home with sage smoke. I then created a sacred circle; white candle in the middle, three separate circles of divination cards, surrounded by my wand in the East, my husband’s in the West, little bubby’s in the South and our family shell in the North.

I sang a prayer to Mother Earth while I waited for my husband to join me, it is how I begin any deep meditation, then I sat in silent meditation. While in my empty silence I saw a vision;

In the vision my hands, which were physically resting open in my lap, were not empty but full with three items; a large wooden heart painted red, a bushel of grain, and a purple stone.

When my husband joined me this is how I opened circle, with a meditation. I asked him to close his eyes and imagine he is holding three items, any three items whatever comes to mind first. Once he saw his vision we began our ceremony.

We pulled four cards from the inner most circle. These cards were for ourselves, little bubby, and our family as a whole.

I pulled Progress which was about “charging forward” and being willing to make mistakes along the way.
My husband pulled Priorities for himself.
I then pulled Risk for our family which is about having faith and believing we are worthy of what we seek.
My husband pulled Magnificence for little bubby which is about bringing your unique golden light to the world.

Then we pulled from the middle circle which represents what the world needs from each one of us individually.

My husband pulled Starseed, the card asked the question, “What lights you up?” My husband described his interpretation of the card beautifully; he envisioned the center core of a star, the fusion, the reactions, what makes it shine. I then asked him what is at his core that he bring forward to the world; he reponded “calm, rationale, and logic”.

I pulled Awakening, it has to do with experiencing energetic shifts and integration. I see this as my call to stand in my Truth and bring my message of Love forward into the world. This is my soul’s purpose that I have awoken to.

Finally we pulled cards from the outer circle. I pulled a card for Mother Earth to hold space for what she needs from all of us collectively. My husband pulled a card for humanity and what humans need (how we all need to be showing up right now).

I pulled compassion; Mother Earth needs deeper Love. My husband pulled Authenticity. We discussed this card, what does it actually mean to be authentic? It is not about being good or right. It is about standing in your integrity, it is when your thoughts, feelings, actions, are all aligned. When I am being authentic during the time of Covid I allow myself permission to feel my fear and anxiety as they rise, without reaction or judgment, I hold myself and comfort myself in these dark moments. In doing so I am released from the need to act on these feelings. Humanity needs more authenticity to help temper the fear. If we are in our fear we will have a harder time being in our Love. The Mother needs us to be in our Love. Love of Self, Love of others, Love of the Mother. We have to see that when we are afraid of what we cannot control or what we do not have we are not considerate of how the ways we act on those fears impact others and The Mother. Heightened consuming hurts The Mother as well as others, usually the most vulnerable. We also do not see how the way we act on out of fear keeps us out of alignment with the Self and our higher purpose. We did not come here to consume and fear and leave. We came hear to Love and share our unique gifts.

At the end my husband shared what his three things were from the visualization; a lucky rabbits foot for our family, a pencil for the world, and a baseball for himself. I know the meaning of these things without explanation and I see the Truth in his vision.

I closed the circle with mantras;

I am healthy. I am safe.
My family is healthy. My family is safe.
We are unaffected by crisis.
We are enough. What we have is enough. What we give is enough.
I am enough.
We are Love. We are Connection. We are calm. We are Peace.

I will do my part to be the Love that I am and stay in my integrity and out of fear and scarcity. I will shine my light bright and do what I can to keep the collective flame burning.

 

Sending BIG Love in uncertain times for all those who need it.

Self-Care in the Time of Virus

These are wild times we are living in friends. I am here to do some middle of the night processing and gratitude counting.

My nervous system became a bit overwhelmed by the triggers today and I am needing just a little extra time to release everything.

I feel my husband and I are responding well to the virus situation. Rather than hoarding we are rationing the supplies we have. We are following social distancing recommendations which has led to little bubby and I creating new fun routines at home during the day. We are also limiting our exposure to the noise of it all; we do not watch the news and we are avoiding discussing it with anyone. My husband checks a few reputable sources each day in case their is new pertinent information, but usually there is not, not for our family at least.

I have felt very balanced about how we are responding AND I am not immune to the fear.

I am having a hard time staying out of scarcity. I will go on amazon to buy an essential and it will be sold out across the board. Scarcity rises immediately and my impulse is to then buy a lot of other things that we are currently stocked up on just in case those things sell out too. Each time this happens I close my laptop and walk away before following through on the impulse.

My husband and I have been having grounding conversations about conservation when scarcity rises; if we run out of hand soap, we can use the bar soap. If we run out of dish washer tablets, we can hand wash. If we run out of daytime diapers, we can use the nighttime diapers. 

Ultimately, we are going to be okay. We are not going to die of filth or hunger. Whatever we have is enough and we will be fine.

So I am not acting on my feelings of scarcity but they still rise when something I tell myself we need is sold out. I sit in the feelings, reality check, ground, let them move through me, and move on.

Another place I am struggling is with unexpected triggers.

Even with the measures we are taking to insulate our family from the energy of fear and panic, I still have low levels of anxiety because of the lack of control and unknowns that come with the situation. This means that my nervous system is activated at all times right now, so when an unexpected trigger gets thrown in my ability to cope is slightly altered. When multiple unexpected triggers arise, coping gets harder.

Here is how I am taking care of myself:

Today when I felt myself hitting the wall of overwhelm I turned off the cartoon little bubby was watching, I put on instrumental music, lit candles, put sage and lavender in the diffuser, made a pot of vegetable soup from left over veg, pulled myself a few cards from my oracle decks, and called a friend to see if she was available for hugs. Then I played with little bubby until nap time at which point my friend arrived with hugs, tea, and sliced apples. We shared vegetable soup, apples, tea and talked around the kitchen table. She stayed through backyard time and after she left little bubby and I had our popcorn and sesame street.

The lack of control is what I struggle with the most. It is hard to feel safe. I find hugs help.

We are doing our best to stay focused on the NOW as we navigate this ever changing new reality. We do this by reality checking with each other when triggered and counting our gratitude. The gratitude practice is huge for staying present and in a positive state of mind.

So here is my gratitude:

I am grateful for a partner who is calm and thoughtful.
I am grateful for hugs and cuddles from my husband and soul friend.
I am grateful for hugs and snuggles with little bubby, especially when I am rocking him to sleep and reaches up and wraps his arms around my neck while I rock him.
I am grateful for doggie cuddles.
I am grateful my family is healthy.
I am grateful for our health insurance.
I am grateful for our home and our community.
I am grateful for my connection with the people I love.
I am grateful for how I respond to my triggers and love myself.
I am grateful for writing and art as a tried and true coping skill.
I am grateful for fresh produce.
I am grateful for clean drinking water.
I am grateful for hot showers.
I am grateful for clean sheets and comfy bedding.
I am grateful for Disney plus and sesame street (not at all kidding)
I am grateful it is spring where I live.
I am grateful for bird song.
I grateful for my belief in my own resiliency.
I am grateful for my therapist and my soul friends who help me hold the work.
I am grateful for Love.
I am grateful for the knowledge that even when things feel most out of control, I always have the power to choose how I respond.
I am grateful for air conditioning.
I am grateful for the sanitation workers who pick up our garbage and recycles.
I am grateful for this time in my life where I get to be here with my son.
I am grateful for my art and that I find my way home to myself in this sacred space.
I am grateful for everyone who loves and supports my family.
I am grateful for kindness.
I am grateful for the quiet calm of our home.
I am grateful for my family.
I am grateful to know I am on my path.
I am grateful to have things to look forward to.
I am grateful for my spirituality.
I am grateful for the knowledge that no matter what I face, I never face it alone.
I am grateful for silliness and play and laughter.
I am grateful for the partnership I have with my husband and the balance we bring to one another.
I am grateful for allergy medicine.
I am grateful for my husband’s job.
I am grateful for books.
I am grateful for nature.
I am grateful for peaceful sleep.
I am grateful for the layers of safety I experience in my life.

I am grateful for Love.